“Chidozie, happy birthday. I don’t know what’s going on but I can’t stand and I am feverish”

2025 has not gone as I planned. And with every curveball, I’ve adjusted course, but the constant replanning has left me drained.

I got into 2025 very hopeful. I had just joined Automattic’s Jetpack team and was building Sunday Morning with Divine & China, with a launch date in sight. I was in a “blissful” relationship and despite all the problems of life, this union was a great source of strength and consistency.

At the beginning of the year, the plan was simple. Three goals – clear, concise and achievable.

• Get married (I know, I know 🙈 – stupid)
• Move out of Nigeria.
• Launch and Grow Sunday Morning.

Anyhow sha, man proposes and God will do what He wants to do.

It’s July and I can only launch and grow Sunday Morning this year. That’s what I’ll focus on for the rest of the year. I’ve made my peace with it. This wasn’t easy to do – every day I fight the constant reminder that I’m failing. Failing to achieve the goals I set for myself. 😔

However, everything changed on the 14th of July 2025 at about 21:20 (or 9:20PM for the 12-hr warriors 🙄). I got several calls from my mother while I was on the phone with my friend, Pelumi. I saw the first call and figured I’d call back after my talk with Pelumi since we hadn’t spoken in months.

Then another call, and another. Then it was three missed calls. This was strange because my mum knows I’ll always call back. I figured it must be something important if she kept calling. I called back and the next thing I heard shook me to my core: “Jesus, save me. Jesus have mercy on me.”

“Chidozie, happy birthday. I don’t know what’s going on but I can’t stand and I am feverish.”

I know that I’m resilient and I’ve been able to fight all my problems head-on, but what the hell man? I was agitated and started wondering what to do next. I could go to her, but my headlamps are bad and I don’t want to be on the Oshodi-Apapa express unable to see those death traps called container trailers.

While I was deliberating this, my mum told me not to come, that she was fine – funny woman. Anyway, I called my friend, Golden, and asked if he was free to drive to Festac with me. Lucky for me, he was, and all I had to do was get to his place.

While we were on the expressway, I was quite proud of the feats my car was accomplishing. It was acting like a Beamer and even I didn’t know we could go that fast. PS: I drive like a grandma.

We got there in about 20 minutes, (thanks to fast and responsible driving 😉) and I was able to take my mum to the hospital. She was taken to the accident & emergency ward. A doctor did some triage and she was admitted. By the time she was moved to her room, we had successfully contained the rigors and she was sleeping soundly.

It’s now past midnight and my mum wakes up to ask if we drove my car. I answered yes. This woman starts to cry. You wouldn’t believe why – she said it’s because the first time she got in my car was to the hospital. That’s not how it’s supposed to be.

…and that’s the story of my year. Things have happened in ways they were not supposed to happen. And every time I look back, it’s hard to understand why a lot of things have happened. The devastating losses, the heartbreaks and depressing episodes.

Why? I have no answer, but I’ve held Isaiah 55:8 closely to my chest and on days like yesterday when I turned 31, I remember that:

“For God’s thoughts are not my thoughts,
    neither are my ways His ways”

Last night has put a lot of things into perspective for me. As I stood there and squeezed my mum’s hand while she prayed for God’s mercy. I did not remember the goals I set for myself that I hadn’t reached. In that moment, my priority was clear. And my focus realigned instantly.

I’m still waiting for the results of her tests to know what went wrong but I’m praying for the best. Right now she’s able to talk and there were no tremors today! ☀️

Every time reality crashes into my expectations, I regroup and try again, but damn!

Until next time, bye. 👋🏽